He Said/She Said is a new series designed to help dudes understand what chicks are thinking. Every week we’ll be throwing out a topic for debate…you can read the guy’s side here and the girl’s side at CollegeCandy.com. This week’s topic: sleeping with a virgin aka “swiping the V-Card”.
I lost my virginity freshman year in college. I was 17 and the girl I slept with was also a virgin though nearly 2 years my senior. It was both triumphant and humiliating, as it is for many guys. On one hand, you’ve finally cracked the code, got on the board, notched the belt. On the other, you lasted all of 30 seconds and you’re 99% sure she didn’t enjoy any of it. ESPECIALLY, if she was a virgin beforehand. The majority of the time if you’re both loyal v-card carrying members of the no sex crew, the first time will probably suck. But that’s what practice is for.
Photo by bilderlounge beyond, fotomedia
But what about when only ONE of you is a virgin and it happens to be the one with all the lady parts? Talk about a sticky situation. Of course, KNOWING she’s a virgin beforehand will definitely help you when it comes down to getting down. If you enter this battle of the bulges, all camou’d out, fully loaded, ready for genital World War 3, you’re going to end up with a very scared individual cowering in a foxhole. Remember that scene in American Pie where Kevin and Vicky finally smoosh? It wasn’t even really a smoosh, but more of a slow, rhythmic grind. I hesitate to even use the word grind because even that sounds too abrasive. It was simply…sliding. No pump, no hump, definitely no rump.
Speaking of rump, you almost have to treat it like you would with someone who’s having anal sex for the first time. Take a bubble bath or nice long hot shower. Maybe an oil massage. Barrels of lube. Scented candles. Relaxing music. Lots of foreplay. Really set the mood so her worries and hang ups melt away. The more gentle and sensitive you are, the more she’ll enjoy what is – from what I’ve heard from women – an uncomfortable and sometimes painful experience.
Go slow. Whisper to her. Make sure you’re aware of her reactions. Since she’s new to the game, she probably won’t be too vocal about what’s working and what isn’t. If you lead the way and maintain a soothing tone and pace, you both will be in a better place.
If she says it’s only her second time, there’s probably a very good chance she’s still a virgin.
If you can’t stand the sight of blood, you might want to invest in a blindfold or… I don’t know… grow a pair.
